Against my better judgment, I found myself flipping through the Portland Phoenix yesterday evening, when I found a "news" "article" about Metro's free ride Fridays.
Author Dave Brady begins fairly enough, observing that Metro's routes are meandering and inconvenient. Then he takes this nauseating dive into condescending snark:
"A ride on the Metro can be confusing, smelly, and long, but occasionally you luck out and find a clean seat next to a fragrance-free passenger... and it can be a great place to people watch.
"On a recent bus ride into the Old Port I witnessed an endearing portrait of the mother-daughter dynamic. While the young mom paid the fare her little girl burst out of a stroller two sizes too small and fell flat on her face. The wee one screeched at the top of her lungs, of course. She looked like she could use a hug, but instead she got a hanky to wipe her tear-induced snots. Then she flicked the handkerchief locker-room style at her apathetic mother’s face.
"You don't get this kind of entertainment in your beat-up Volvo."
It's so true... you really don’t get that kind of entertainment in the old yuppie-mobile your suburban parents gave you to take to the small liberal arts college where you learned how to become a pretentious twit. This Dave Brady character certainly is a keen observer of the human condition.
Learn more, and find out where you can purchase a copy.
1 comment:
This post needs to be the first thing people read when they Google "The Phoenix."
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